The life of a college student is rife with theft. Whether you take a chair off someone's porch or make off with the entire contents of a fraternity's kitchen, you will often wake up in the morning surrounded by belongings that only recently acquired the status of belonging to you. I express it in this fashion because it's a common occurence that you can't recall the activities of the previous night until after you roll over and see two pint glasses and a capuccino machine on the pillow next to you. Who knows what extraplanar creature possessed your body during the hours that are forever obliterated from your remembered history. The life of a college student is also subsequently convenient, because you never actually have to
buy anything.
I have never had the opportunity to steal a robot. How would you even do it? I imagine you could just say, "hey robot, follow me." Maybe you'd have to entice it, like, "hey robot, I have some delicious mercury in my pocket." Most likely, you could just pick it up and carry it off the way you would a stereo. I mean, what's it gonna do? Nothing that hitting it with a hammer won't prevent. Would the theft be considered breaking a commandment? Though shalt not covet thine neighbor's robot.
Had I pursued a line of work that related to my degree, I would probably be building robots right now. At least some piece of them. Nobody nowadays ever actually builds all of something. I once saw a newborn baby who's ears were made in Mexico and who's eyes were made in Korea. It would understand English when you spoke really loudly, and it would start salivating whenever it saw a dog. More seriously though, if robots ever did become sentient, they would have one hell of an identity crisis. I hope though that they never do become smart, because I'd hate to have to argue with my robot to get me a beer. The only advantage it would have over a woman
then would be that I could at least turn it off. Robots and women do both have one thing in common. They both look sexy in an apron.
Today's post was dedicated to OJ.
~Fuzzy
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