Some day we'll make a comic about chainsaws, or monster trucks, or javelin throwing, or some other equally manly subject. I mean, we
are a comic about "sex, beer, and all things manly," and so far we've only talked about....... sex. We're often drunk while we write/draw, so we kind of have the second item quietly covered as well. But all things manly? It's probably because sex and beer are all the things that real men care about. Any man who claims to have any hobbies or interests beyond those is fucking metro. "Oh look at me, I'm so manly and cosmopolitan. I like watching football and shooting lions." Well
fuck you poser. The next items on that list are probably crocheting and waxing your crack. I will admit though: Convincing a lady that you honestly care about sailing and backgammon will probably distract her from the truth... You just want her to get you a beer.
Alright, on to today's comic. I just saw it a few minutes ago so I'm still acclimating to it. So it's got me in it. It's got OJ. It's got a girl, waxing stupid. And it's in a bar. I really wish there was a pterodactyl in the background. At least then I could talk about dinosaurs (another manly subject). But there isn't. There fucking isn't. There is no goddamn flying dinosaur in that comic. There isn't even a bird. Not even a freaking
fly.
It's a well chronicled truism that love can make you do stupid things. It can make you ignore even the most salient of uncomfortable facts. But that's how we were programmed. Billions of years ago, it could have been that we were about to get eaten by a pterodactyl, but we kept drilling the cavewoman because of
love. We were evolved to "fall in love", so that given a choice between pounding rocks together and getting it on, we would choose the latter, thereby perpetuating the species. So far I have pissed off historical enthusiasts, proponents of Intelligent Design, and the cavemen from those hilarious Geiko commercials. I'm not sure if there's anyone still reading at this point.
So what? So what if in a time when Spears referred to a tool for hunting as opposed to a tool on the radio, we were programmed to make little versions of us? What difference does it make now? Well what happened is that the world changed way faster than our curmudgeonly chromosomes. So we have all these crazy ridiculous emotions that make us do the most idiotic things that made sense a long fucking time ago. So it's not really our faults that men have a one-track mind, and that women have a mind that gets off track all the time. It's the fault of those irritating ass-faced pterodactyls that kept eating us.
I managed to talk about dinosaurs after all.
~Fuzzy
Read the comic!
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