Skip to main content

Teraport Wars Pre-Orders are Open!

 The Teraport Wars,' by Howard TaylerSchlock Mercenary: The Teraport Wars is now available for pre-order. This book fits between The Tub of Happiness and Under New Management, and with it you can now own the first 1000 strips in a complete print collection.

The book is $25.00, plus shipping and handling. If you want a numbered, customer-choice sketch edition it’s $35.00+s&h, but those are only available until 8:00am on Friday (GMT-7).

This 228-page volume is in full color on glossy paper, and contains all the strips and footnotes from November 12th of 2001 through March 8th of 2003. It also features some new footnotes, commentary, guest art, eleven pages of all-new bonus story, and an introduction by Brandon Sanderson.

Customers pre-ordering the book will be treated to a page full of desktop wallpapers featuring the full, wrap-around cover art at multiple resolutions and aspect ratios.

Sketch editions will only be available through Friday morning at 8:00am Mountain time, or until we’ve sold 1,000 of them… whichever comes SECOND. Over 150 have already been spoken for by Comic-Con and WorldCon attendees, so don’t delay! If past experience is any indicator, we’ll probably end up selling around 1100 of these by Friday morning, and then they’re gone. (In the unlikely event that we don’t hit 1,000 by Friday, we’ll keep the item available until we do.)

We expect to take delivery of 5,000 books around September 25th, at which point I’ll start signing and sketching. We plan to start shipping books out on October 9th, which gives me two full weeks to finish up those sketches (resting my hand a bit more than I have in the past.)

In the exceedingly unlikely event that you folks buy more than 5,000 books during the pre-order period, there will be a slight shipping delay as we throw more money at our printer and demand a second run. Know, however, that this is just the sort of problem I’d love to have.

And now, the FAQ:

Q: Can I buy other stuff from the store, and have you ship it all at once?

A: Absolutely. We have the popular warning-sign magnets back in stock,  as well as mousemats, Tagon logo pins, Rule 37 shirts, and Rule 1 shirts. If there are impressionable children in your life, grab a copy of Hold On To Your Horses, the children’s book by Sandra Tayler and illustrated by Angela Call.

Q: Where do you ship?

A: Everywhere.

Q: What does the desktop background look like?

A: This.

Teraport Wars pre-order desktop wallpaper

Q: What if my order gets damaged, or I’m just not happy with it?

A: We’ll make it right at no additional expense to you. Ask anybody who has shopped with us before — if your book is damaged, or you’re otherwise displeased with your purchase, we’ll fix it. Usually it means sending out a replacement. We’ve upgraded our shipping materials so that there are fewer damaged packages, but it still happens.

Q: I don’t like credit cards or Paypal. Can I pay with a cheque?
A: It’s slower, but yes.  The instructions for that are on the store.

Q: I’ve got a question that is not on this list. Why can’t you read my mind?

A: I actually can read your mind. I ran out of steam typing the list in. Email schlockmercenary@gmail.com with your question and we’ll answer it for you.