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Open Soapbox: Webcartoonists Are Communists

Webcartoonists are communists.

That's right... they're all commies. Or maybe socialists, but that's as close as should make no difference to someone who is merely 'left-wing,' let alone decently 'conservative.' See, a REAL cartoonist is paid by a large, properly-capitalist organization called, in true Republican fashion, a Syndicate. He or she pours creative energy into work that is edited, collated, marketed, and pushed to the Free Press, where it can be shared with millions of humor-hungry people in exchange for newspaper subscriptions. It is The American Way (in America, and even in countries that claim to hate America... it's still the American Way.)

Webcartoonists, however, produce their "art" (and I use the term loosely) for no pay at all, and can therefore only survive in a society willing to support their 'donated' work -- a communist society, by definition. Some of these hacks create their webcomics for what they actually believe to be the common good, in an attempt to edify others.

Just like the feared "domino-effect" of international communism in the sixties, seventies, and eighties, their work and their philosophy spreads virally. Why, as little as ten years ago there were NO web comics, and now there are thousands, with the estimated number of webcomics more than doubling every year since 1993 (with the debut of the insidious Doctor Fun, whose "author" is clearly the vilifiable Karl Marx of webcartooning). At the current rate of growth, by the year 2025 one human being in two will be a webcartoonist.

Traditional values will have been long washed away in a tide of commie sympathizing, and countless millions will starve. Just one year later everyone will be a webcartoonist, and the invading aliens will mock our pathetic attempts to feed ourselves on the offal we call amateur humor. Then, wisely, they'll use their hemoglobin-combustion ray to destroy all so-called "higher" life-forms on the planet.

We can only hope they will not themselves be infected by the plague that is webcartooning, and that they'll vote Libertarian.

Or maybe Republican.

Re: Open Soapbox by Howard Tayler: Webcartoonists Are Communists

I have to ask, what prompted this? Has someone been making foul insinuations about your fine comic, or have they merely been snobbish about "real" comics in general? (Snobbish about comics? I have to go have a good laugh now... maybe I'll pop over to my favorite WEBCOMICS for humor...)

Re: Open Soapbox: Webcartoonists Are Communists

Ha ha! Nicely done, Howard! But you forgot the fact that webcomics are also used as mind control for the masses, hidden messages contained within their very pixels, subverting all who read them! Evil!

..and yes, vote Libertarian!

My REAL reply

Howard Tayler's picture

Now that I'm logged in, you can see that it's really ME saying this. And yeah, it's deadlines that inspire me. Oh, sweet deadlines.

--Howard

Schlock Mercenary

Re: Open Soapbox by Howard Tayler: Webcartoonists Are Communists

I'm a Communist?!?!?!?

No wonder I haven't been feeling so well lately.

This explains a lot of things.

Jim ;)

Re: Open Soapbox by Howard Tayler: Webcartoonists Are Communists

Yeah. Dontcha know it. Before too long them darn pigs er...artists... will be changing the sign to say "All webcomics are equal, but some are more equal than others" when the popular genres pool all the fans donations away from other webcomics...causing a donation monopoly!

Re: Open Soapbox by Howard Tayler: Webcartoonists Are Communists

Was I the only one who read the byline as "Howard Tayler is a guest **communist**..."??

...need...sleep...

Re: Open Soapbox by Howard Tayler: Webcartoonists Are Communists

Yes, but KeenSpot (on which Mr. Tayler's strip is hosted) makes money by charging for advertising. No charge to the consumer, but it's not exactly a non-profit enterprise. By that logic, TV stations are communist, as are radio stations...

Re: Open Soapbox by Howard Tayler: Webcartoonists Are Communists

Yes, but the difference is that politicians haven't figured out how to use webcomics to forward their agendas yet. It's not communist if it's being used to the benefit of politicians.