L.A. Times Drops Garfield

In a bold move that has undoubtedly enraged little old ladies everywhere the L.A. Times has dropped Garfield from its comics page.

Gene Weingarten describes “Garfield” as “a strip produced by a committee, devoid of originality, devoid of guts, a strip cynically DESIGNED to be inoffensive and bad, on the theory that public tastes are insipid.”




  1. Bravo! Bring on the next slab of offal. It’s progress, but just because it’s new doesn’t mean it deserves to be up there — “Brewster Rockit” is one of the worst new strips.

  2. “Stop… Hurting… America.”

    Kinda funny that they canceled the strip on a Monday.

  3. It should be noted that the comic replacing them, ‘Brevity,’ originally started as the WEBCOMIC ‘Cow Tools’ over at Comic Sherpa.

  4. “She added that Jim Davis is “hands on” with his comic…”

    Yeah, he shows up and gets his hands on his weekly paycheck.

  5. Oh man that was funny Kris! I just didn’t get through my whole webcomics trawl earlier today… 🙁

    (It’s like they expect results at work or something)

  6. They keep shouting about something called “productivity” where I work. I guess it’s a new soft drink or something. I should get a case next time I’m at the store.

  7. I would like to see every comic no longer being done by the person who created it ripped from the newspaper. It disgusts me to no end that after an artist dies or gives up on his creation the vultures swoop in to feast on the goo. I’m glad Charles Shultz had the power to be able to stop the syndicates from having someone else draw and write his strip. Pity he wasn’t able to stop them from re-running it as “Classic Peanuts”. Mmmm mmmm mmmmm, nothing beats the gamey taste of Shultz corpse.

    Of course it’s pretty rare that I actually read a newspaper anyways since the internet is a far superior method of gathering information than something printed the night before on dried up dead tree goop, but from my own local paper I can tell you which comics I would personally love to see follow Garfield into retirement.

    BC: If I wanted to believe that cavemen were Christians I’d still be a Pentecostal thank you very much.

    Wizard Of Id: More like Wizard of Suck. Yes, yes, we get it already. The King is a FINK.

    Dennis The Menace: Shouldn’t he be in prison by now? This comic was old even when I was a kid, and I’m pretty freaking old here.

    Hi and Lois: Only once has this strip ever EVER made me laugh and it was a strip where the punchline insinuated that Lois was having an affair with the alcoholic nextdoor neighbour.

    Blondie: Unless Blondie and her neighbour’s wife start having lots of lesbian bondage sex I think I’ve seen everything this strip has to offer. Don’t let the door (or the mailman) hit you in the ass on the way out.

    Sally Forth: This one wins the award for “syndicated comic most like your typical webcomic” and it managed to win that back before there was a WWW. Ha! Ha! She ate the ears off her daughter’s easterbunny. Didn’t see that one coming. This comic is so bad that strict Mormon families read it and think “damn, this family is really boring”. When a freaking hack like me is able to look at a strip and say “dear sweet mother of god, the artwork is horrible!” then you know it really has to be bad.

    Marmaduke: Has never been funny except to a certain type of dog owner, you know the ones that like to dress their dogs up in maching outfits. I know what you’re thinking, “Oh no. No! If you take Marmaduke out of the newspaper wherever will I read about Joanne Miclupch from Wankminster Michigan who has a corgi named Mitzy who piddles on the carpet everytime she hears someone jingle their keys”? Well don’t worry about it. I’m sure those people have a blog somewhere.

    Cathy: Ah Cathy. Picking on you is almost far too easy a thing to do. What more needs to be said about the strip that has done so much to undermine everything that feminism and women’s liberation fought for? Cathy must be the easiest strip to write. All you need is a lame two panel gag (and the punchline usually has something to do with being fat or emotionally retarded). Panel 1) Set up. Panel 2) Frantic ranting. Panel 3) See panel 2. Panel 4) Something that almost passes for a punchline. Not even the tentacle monsters will have you Cathy. Not even the tentacle monsters.

    Beetle Baily: What bothers me as a former soldier is that civillians might read this strip and think “sure it sucks, but it’s probably ‘military humour’ written to amuse our brave boys (and girls) in uniform. I’m sure if I was in the armed forces I would get the joke and appreciate it. These people already sacrifice so much to safeguard our freedoms so I’ll forgive Beetle Baily for taking up valuable real-estate in my paper’s comics page. It’s the least I can do for our soldiers”. Well no. It isn’t. It’s not even close to being military humour. It’s just not funny. Peroid. Soldiers don’t get the joke because there’s no joke there for them to get. For the love of those of us who shed blood and tears to give you a free country in which to live please take this comic strip out of your local newspaper. Thank you.

    Hagar The Horrible: – Yes. Fathers are lazy around the house and negligent of their duties. We don’t need vikings to tell us this. Vikings are good for only three things. Pillaging, raping, and burning (best done in that order). As far as vikings go Hagar is not really that horrible. His “pillaging” on the continent seems to be more of a business trip than anything else. His pillaging is sub par, and I have yet to see him actually rape or burn anything. This strip serves no purpose.

    Sherman’s Lagoon: You know… Jabberjaw pretty much covered all that needed to be covered in the way of shark humour. Thank you. Buh-bye.

    Arlo and Janis: You know those games where you’re presented with a complex drawing and you have to find all the hidden faces in it? This strip is like that except you’re hunting for the funny.

    Tina’s Groove: I suspect that wait-staff feel the same way about this strip as I do about Beetle Baily. Don’t worry brave waiters and waitresses. I know there’s no funny here.

    Drabble: Drabble, dribble, drivel, it all adds up to bland and repetative.

    Buckles: Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate furries. Some of my best friends are furries. Furries can be bright and funny people. The guy who does this strip is neither.

    Marvin: Hey hey kids. We’ve taken Dennis the Menace and brought him into the 21st century. Still suck? You betcha!

    Between Friends: WTF!?! My newspaper already runs one too many Sally Forth strips, what makes them think we need another?

    Classic Peanuts: Charles Shultz is dead and hasn’t been funny since the 60s. This strip isn’t getting any fresher you know.

    Edge City: And the “edge” would be where exactly? On the blade this strip makes me want to draw across my forearm everytime I read it?

    Crackshaft: Yeah, I got a shaft for you right here buddy. Right here!

    And saving the best for last…

    Family Circus: Ida Know, does anyone think this strip is funny? Not Me! It’s a weird sort of world Bil Keane must live in that it can make “Leave It To Beaver” look dark and edgie. If the paper would run it without the captions making it easier for the reader to add their own I could forgive this strip still being published. I grew up in an extremely right-wing, conservative, strict christian small-town household and I can tell you even we thought the Keane family was pretty lame. I picture pan-galactic celebrations similar to the end of the remake of Jedi the day this strip sees its publication run ended. I fear to visit the kind of place where any of these strips I’ve listed, much less Family Circus is considered funny. Somebody has to be buying the books though. I’ve consistantly seen them in the comics section of nearly every bookstore ever since I was a little kid. Maybe there exists a strange cult of Keane whose members are obligated to buy the books, then re-sell them back to the bookstore only to buy them again. Kind of like what the Scientologists do with L.R. Hubbards crap. They must be the scariest god damned cult alive.

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